1. Focus on what you can control.

When you focus on what you can control, rather than what you cannot control, you begin to look for solutions on how to solve your challenge or obstacle. A good rule of thumb is to focus 90% of your energy on the solution and only 10% on the problem. Most of us have the tendency to do the opposite. Focus on solutions and the answers will surface. 

2. Focus on what you have.

We tend to focus on what is missing. Focus instead on all the amazing things you DO HAVE, right now. The health, the relationships, the family, the job, the possessions, or the friends. This mindset reset will shift your attitude so that it serves you. 

3. Help others.

Focus on serving others. This may feel counter-intuitive: How can I afford to help someone else when I am juggling the demands of raising a family, overwhelmed and stressed at work, or unable to focus on my own health and wellness? When you do good for others you release hormones like dopamine, serotonin and endorphins which help regulate your mood and promote positive feelings, like happiness and pleasure. Where is a need that you can meet? How could you put your expertise to work? Volunteer, pay a visit to someone who is ill, offer free professional advice to a small business owner, donate a plant to an elderly person in a nursing home, or call a relative or a friend who needs some encouragement. 

4. Choose to be kind.

Smile and be polite, regardless of the situation. Know that everyone has some battle they are fighting- a divorce, unemployment, a bad relationship with a family member or even a silent illness.

5. Keep learning, keep growing.

Research shows that human beings must make progress in order to feel happy. Take online courses, invest in webinars, listen to Ted Talks and read biographies of individuals you look up to. Keep your mind busy and never stop learning. 

6. Stop the habit of feeling fearful. 

Fear is natural, but it should not stop you from staking steps to achieve your goals.You can find several brilliant strategies to conquer fear in one of my most favorite books: Feel the Fear and Do it Anyway, by Susan Jeffers. A wonderful strategy to combat fear is to acknowledge the FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real), write down the facts and then rate each of them on a scale of 1-10 as to how likely they are to actually materialize. Give it a go! And when all else fails, remember those times when you triumphed in the face of fear. 

7. Stop pressuring yourself to do it all.

Sometimes we have to accept that we just cannot get it all done. As my mother used to say, “do your best, and leave the rest.” Period. Pat yourself on the back for all you have accomplished thus far. 

8. Focus on your successes.

Remember how far you have come. Most of the time we focus on our past mistakes, our failures and what we didn’t accomplish. We look at how far we have to go, we compare ourselves to others and we wonder why we haven’t achieved as much as they have. Write out a list of 50 of your own personal successes, no matter how big or small. Read them over and over again. Revel in your greatness! Better yet, write them on a folded up post-it, put them in a jar next to your bed, or even next to your coffee machine, and pull out a few each day to read.

9. Avoid Comparison!

This is dangerous territory. “Comparison is the thief of joy,” as Theodore Roosevelt once said. When you find yourself playing the comparison game, acknowledge it, breathe, and consider what you’re trying to achieve when making this comparison.

10. Believe in yourself and your abilities.

If you don’t believe in yourself, it will be hard for anyone else to. You are unique.You have talents, experiences and skills that nobody else in this world has. Stand up tall and own it, girlfriend!